Today is Saturday. It's a chilly, rainy-looking day & I am off to go help my sister paint her house :)
Later my mother & siblings will be coming over to help finish harvesting all the grapes still left on the vines next to my house. It'll be a good day & I just wanted to share with you a little of that greatfulness & gratefulness. I wish you all the best too!
Showing posts with label laughter. Show all posts
Showing posts with label laughter. Show all posts
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Got to love Love
Every road that I've been down
The only truth that I have found
There's only one thing I can't live without
You.
-It's a song by Rascal Flatts, and even though Sam really doesn't like their sound (he says it's too whiney) it made me think of him :)
He's out of town this week and our wedding anniversary is this Saturday.
I can't believe I have the wonderful chance at forever with my best friend. It still makes me so happy to think about.
I really can't live without him, he is so much a part of who I am.
I think about that sometimes, when I'm missing him while he's away. That if I didn't know he would be coming home soon, I might not know how to keep living. Life just wouldn't quite make sense.
Haha, I hope no one thinks I'd go suicidal if somehow he died soon, because I'm totally not that kind of person. I'd keep living, but a very large part of me would be gone, and I'd miss him terribly.
He is the sanity in my life, the laughter, the meaning behind the 'why', the person who completes me.
I love you Sammy :)
So much.
The only truth that I have found
There's only one thing I can't live without
You.
-It's a song by Rascal Flatts, and even though Sam really doesn't like their sound (he says it's too whiney) it made me think of him :)
He's out of town this week and our wedding anniversary is this Saturday.
I can't believe I have the wonderful chance at forever with my best friend. It still makes me so happy to think about.
I really can't live without him, he is so much a part of who I am.
I think about that sometimes, when I'm missing him while he's away. That if I didn't know he would be coming home soon, I might not know how to keep living. Life just wouldn't quite make sense.
Haha, I hope no one thinks I'd go suicidal if somehow he died soon, because I'm totally not that kind of person. I'd keep living, but a very large part of me would be gone, and I'd miss him terribly.
He is the sanity in my life, the laughter, the meaning behind the 'why', the person who completes me.
I love you Sammy :)
So much.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
We've moved!
Yep, it's true! To my grandma's home in West Jordan. We're almost all the way through everything... our room is still a slight disaster. It'll get there though.
I want to just take this opportunity to say how grateful I am that we had the experience of living with Sam's parents for the past six/seven months :) I honestly think it was the best thing for us. You see before Sam & I got married we didn't spend a lot of time around his family... I didn't necessarily feel like I had a place in their family, it's well established & there are older siblings already married & so I all the sudden went from a well-known place of Oldest Daughter & Child, to somewhere in the middle of somewhere. It was rather... different. But now I have relationships with his family, and I don't feel such a stranger.
Oh it hasn't necessarily been all peachy keen all the time, there were plenty of frustrations & hurt feelings, stepped on toes & unsaid/unmet expectations. And washing dishes for 14+ people did get overwhelming more often than not. I'm as guilty as the next person of not pulling my 'full weight' sometimes.
Through it all I've learned firsthand a lot about the family I married into, about my husband, and about myself. And I love them :)
I am grateful for this chance to have more space though. And to actually cook our own food *gasp!* haha
I want to just take this opportunity to say how grateful I am that we had the experience of living with Sam's parents for the past six/seven months :) I honestly think it was the best thing for us. You see before Sam & I got married we didn't spend a lot of time around his family... I didn't necessarily feel like I had a place in their family, it's well established & there are older siblings already married & so I all the sudden went from a well-known place of Oldest Daughter & Child, to somewhere in the middle of somewhere. It was rather... different. But now I have relationships with his family, and I don't feel such a stranger.
Oh it hasn't necessarily been all peachy keen all the time, there were plenty of frustrations & hurt feelings, stepped on toes & unsaid/unmet expectations. And washing dishes for 14+ people did get overwhelming more often than not. I'm as guilty as the next person of not pulling my 'full weight' sometimes.
Through it all I've learned firsthand a lot about the family I married into, about my husband, and about myself. And I love them :)
I am grateful for this chance to have more space though. And to actually cook our own food *gasp!* haha
Friday, January 15, 2010
It's January
Nothing quite reminds you of that more than the smog currently inhabiting the valley floor right? I was driving to my sister-in-law's baby shower last night and it was amazing the difference between Salt Lake and Utah counties. This morning there wasn't much of one, but still, I know what I saw, and it WAS clear in Utah county last night. Makes me grateful I don't live in this yucky air all the time. My grandma's house (where we are staying currently while Sam has work up here) is smack dab in the middle of the city, but excepting the fog you couldn't really tell, here on this sleepy dead end road of a street. I've always loved her house. Just pick it up and move it into the country where it truly belongs (and where it was, a mere 40 years ago) and I would be content to spend the rest of my life is such a house as this.
The wisdom and love from the amazing people who have made this house a home has crept into every nook and cranny of this lovely rambler and it's home to many a pleasant memory for me. It's where I learned the art of cookie making, the joy of the sound of a piano, where I got my first ballet lessons, cake decorating lessons, and so many more lessons on the nuances of life, both adolescent and adult. This is the home that has hosted so many Easter egg hunts, 4th of July celebrations, Christmases and Thanksgivings, and so many more gatherings, even once holding our family as we grieved the passing of a beloved uncle, son, brother, and friend. Yet there was laughter there too, as we recalled so many memories now engraved in our hearts.
This is a place I run for solace, when the world has gone crazy and I'm unsure of myself and the path I should take. For here I regain my bearings and recommit to myself and who I am becoming.
Isn't that what January is all about? Recommiting, rededicating, and recentering.
The wisdom and love from the amazing people who have made this house a home has crept into every nook and cranny of this lovely rambler and it's home to many a pleasant memory for me. It's where I learned the art of cookie making, the joy of the sound of a piano, where I got my first ballet lessons, cake decorating lessons, and so many more lessons on the nuances of life, both adolescent and adult. This is the home that has hosted so many Easter egg hunts, 4th of July celebrations, Christmases and Thanksgivings, and so many more gatherings, even once holding our family as we grieved the passing of a beloved uncle, son, brother, and friend. Yet there was laughter there too, as we recalled so many memories now engraved in our hearts.
This is a place I run for solace, when the world has gone crazy and I'm unsure of myself and the path I should take. For here I regain my bearings and recommit to myself and who I am becoming.
Isn't that what January is all about? Recommiting, rededicating, and recentering.
Monday, January 11, 2010
Pregnant women make me laugh
It's true. I have so many friends and family members pregnant right now it's crazy! One of my friends just found out she is expecting and they were only married a month before Sam and I, she's been a wonderful friend, one I've had for years now, and she currently lives only 15 minutes away from me so it kind of struck home (no pun intended) that "Hello! I get to see a friend be pregnant!" I mean sure my sister-in-law LaRee is pregnant but they are on their fifth child so it's not quite the same experience for her as it is for this friend or how it will be for me when I get that chance. It makes me laugh though because observing different women and how they handle their pregnancies, I find all sorts of behavior from one end of the spectrum to the other and it makes me wonder what I'll be like when I'm prego.
Something else that cracks me up is that my mother just had a baby in November and she looks like she could be mine so when I walk around in public with her in my arms people we know give me strange looks and I know exactly what they're thinking aka "She hasn't been married long enough to have a baby, am I missing something here?" or "I didn't know it'd been that long, how could... what?" haha No. I was not seven months along when we got married, that would be my mother :D And I just get the blessing of vicariously calling her mine.
Anyway, my sweetheart is falling asleep on the floor next to me, I think it's time for bed. Night all!
Something else that cracks me up is that my mother just had a baby in November and she looks like she could be mine so when I walk around in public with her in my arms people we know give me strange looks and I know exactly what they're thinking aka "She hasn't been married long enough to have a baby, am I missing something here?" or "I didn't know it'd been that long, how could... what?" haha No. I was not seven months along when we got married, that would be my mother :D And I just get the blessing of vicariously calling her mine.
Anyway, my sweetheart is falling asleep on the floor next to me, I think it's time for bed. Night all!
Monday, August 10, 2009
Hi and bye again
Wow, long time no news. Sorry about that. Well, I'm engaged. Officially now :D
He did a great job with it too. We went back to the first place we kissed, where he pulled out the ring and proposed. Pretty much I was totally NOT expecting it, I was completely shocked and extremely pleasantly surprised. Haha :)
My birthday went well, it was a good day. Went to the park and had cake and ice cream with the fam.
The date for our wedding is set for September 25th. A little less than seven weeks away. Yay!
And crazy.
Well the dress I ordered... wasn't what I wanted. So instead his mom is making my wedding dress. I'm grateful she's such a great seamstress.
My family is leaving on the trek this week, I get to stay home and babysit :) It shouldn't be a real challenge since I'll only have the little ones. We'll have fun.
So pretty much, I'm marrying the most wonderful guy ever. He's so sweet to me. I love how we can communicate, and things always get worked out in the end. I only hope I can be as good for him, as he has been for me.
He did a great job with it too. We went back to the first place we kissed, where he pulled out the ring and proposed. Pretty much I was totally NOT expecting it, I was completely shocked and extremely pleasantly surprised. Haha :)
My birthday went well, it was a good day. Went to the park and had cake and ice cream with the fam.
The date for our wedding is set for September 25th. A little less than seven weeks away. Yay!
And crazy.
Well the dress I ordered... wasn't what I wanted. So instead his mom is making my wedding dress. I'm grateful she's such a great seamstress.
My family is leaving on the trek this week, I get to stay home and babysit :) It shouldn't be a real challenge since I'll only have the little ones. We'll have fun.
So pretty much, I'm marrying the most wonderful guy ever. He's so sweet to me. I love how we can communicate, and things always get worked out in the end. I only hope I can be as good for him, as he has been for me.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Unknown Luggage
Last night I went to a special Girl's Class presentation. It was entitled Women Who Knew Jesus, and I feel grateful I was able to go. I'd debated skipping, but usually when I feel that way it just means I need to go even more :)
The snow has melted away today and it's sunny again. I love Montana weather, more moody than anyone I know, but that's what makes it so much fun.
My sister and I were able to chat for a little bit last night, she was riding home from Temple Prep and had some time before she'd be home and asleep. She'd left her journal down in Mexico when we went down there but providentially it was next to Martene's boxes and got packed into James' car when they were leaving the next day. So, a week and a half later, it returns to the owner (hopefully not having been read though haha). She was pretty excited.
More and more I'm coming to realize how grateful I am to have been raised in a family who loves education, and even more than that, loves learning. It's made life a lot easier.
The snow has melted away today and it's sunny again. I love Montana weather, more moody than anyone I know, but that's what makes it so much fun.
My sister and I were able to chat for a little bit last night, she was riding home from Temple Prep and had some time before she'd be home and asleep. She'd left her journal down in Mexico when we went down there but providentially it was next to Martene's boxes and got packed into James' car when they were leaving the next day. So, a week and a half later, it returns to the owner (hopefully not having been read though haha). She was pretty excited.
More and more I'm coming to realize how grateful I am to have been raised in a family who loves education, and even more than that, loves learning. It's made life a lot easier.
Monday, May 4, 2009
Just a little piece of the story
Home again home again jiggity jog. The Utah home that is.
We got in at 3 this morning. Good thing I don't really have anything planned today :)
Well, there we go, the last of my dad's siblings has now been married off. Now for the grandkids. haha, though after this weekend we will have two already checked off.
It's so funny, Martene's mom is SUCH a match maker and I'm sure if she wouldn't have been thoroughly occupied with wedding preparations she could have found someone for everyone. She'd already planned on introducing my divorced uncle to a lady who also didn't end up being able to attend. Just makes me laugh.
I could start to tell all about the trip but honestly, you'd have to be there to appreciate most of it.
The people down there are lovely, wonderful, happy people. Oh you should have SEEN their houses, they were pretty much incredible. AMAZING, in other words. I wish I could have had a better camera than just my phone to snap pictures with.
The wedding went well, I think for them, it was perfect. I would have done some things differently, but that's just because my taste is different from Martene's :)
The groom looked snazzy, like, as my aunt pointed out, he always does. Martene is one lucky girl. James is one of those guys you can't help but love for all the kindness and consideration that he has.
And he didn't do too badly himself. He's got a wife who knows how to cook, sew, sing, play the piano, slaughter animals, is learning how to deliver babies, and to top it all off, is one of the most gorgeous people I know. Both inside and out.
To see them together did my heart good, to see how absolutely In Love they are, how they are best friends and the look in his eyes when she first began to walk down that isle, there are no words. You'd have to be there to know.
We got in at 3 this morning. Good thing I don't really have anything planned today :)
Well, there we go, the last of my dad's siblings has now been married off. Now for the grandkids. haha, though after this weekend we will have two already checked off.
It's so funny, Martene's mom is SUCH a match maker and I'm sure if she wouldn't have been thoroughly occupied with wedding preparations she could have found someone for everyone. She'd already planned on introducing my divorced uncle to a lady who also didn't end up being able to attend. Just makes me laugh.
I could start to tell all about the trip but honestly, you'd have to be there to appreciate most of it.
The people down there are lovely, wonderful, happy people. Oh you should have SEEN their houses, they were pretty much incredible. AMAZING, in other words. I wish I could have had a better camera than just my phone to snap pictures with.
The wedding went well, I think for them, it was perfect. I would have done some things differently, but that's just because my taste is different from Martene's :)
The groom looked snazzy, like, as my aunt pointed out, he always does. Martene is one lucky girl. James is one of those guys you can't help but love for all the kindness and consideration that he has.
And he didn't do too badly himself. He's got a wife who knows how to cook, sew, sing, play the piano, slaughter animals, is learning how to deliver babies, and to top it all off, is one of the most gorgeous people I know. Both inside and out.
To see them together did my heart good, to see how absolutely In Love they are, how they are best friends and the look in his eyes when she first began to walk down that isle, there are no words. You'd have to be there to know.
Saturday, April 25, 2009
Amazing Strength
I love my father. He is such a strength to me.
He called me yesterday and we chatted for a bit before he had to go pack for camping. It was good though :)
Ironic how you don't realize how much stress you're under until someone bothers listening and asking how you're doing and really meaning it.
Last night we did finally get to go bowling, it was good. I think the highest score was 60. Amazing huh? Haha, I love my boys so much. Like I told Cassandra- Nothing like an overdose of underdeveloped testosterone. They make me laugh though. And are really sweet and boyish, for lack of a better word, when not around other grown ups. Funny how people put on an act for those older than they.
Then came home and watched El Cid with my grandma. It's a good movie, true story, etc etc. Long, but good. They have some interesting camera angles and lighting in the film. The thing that amazed me so much about them was how determined they were to do right, this man and his wife. They sacrificed a lot, but in return, gained what truly mattered. The knowledge and comfort that comes from living your life according to principles of truth and right. Even though it meant facing death and suffering possibly everyday of their lives.
Made me want to be that kind of person, having that strength. To support my husband in what we knew was right.
Just extremely inspiring and, if perchance you have an extra three hours with nothing to do, go watch it.
He called me yesterday and we chatted for a bit before he had to go pack for camping. It was good though :)
Ironic how you don't realize how much stress you're under until someone bothers listening and asking how you're doing and really meaning it.
Last night we did finally get to go bowling, it was good. I think the highest score was 60. Amazing huh? Haha, I love my boys so much. Like I told Cassandra- Nothing like an overdose of underdeveloped testosterone. They make me laugh though. And are really sweet and boyish, for lack of a better word, when not around other grown ups. Funny how people put on an act for those older than they.
Then came home and watched El Cid with my grandma. It's a good movie, true story, etc etc. Long, but good. They have some interesting camera angles and lighting in the film. The thing that amazed me so much about them was how determined they were to do right, this man and his wife. They sacrificed a lot, but in return, gained what truly mattered. The knowledge and comfort that comes from living your life according to principles of truth and right. Even though it meant facing death and suffering possibly everyday of their lives.
Made me want to be that kind of person, having that strength. To support my husband in what we knew was right.
Just extremely inspiring and, if perchance you have an extra three hours with nothing to do, go watch it.
Friday, April 24, 2009
Say Hey, it's a Good Day
Haha, oh yes it is! Go look up the song. It fits my mood perfectly.
I'm incredibly happy.
Got a grand total of 50 cents in my savings account and had to borrow $5 just to make my car payment... but I'm rich in so many other ways and the monetary value can't be measured on those.
I have a few, wonderful, true friends, an incredible family, and amazing students. I know a God who blesses and loves his children, and me specifically. I'm not just a name to him. I'm not just a number. I'm me. All of me. And he loves me more than I can ever fully comprehend. He is my best friend and I hope to always keep that relationship flourishing.
I have clothes and food and a healthy body. I have been granted countless opportunities to become better and to just be able to LIVE.
I do not want for anything really.
School is coming along marvelously, today we have a field trip to a pond and a spelling bee. And bowling. FINALLY!!!!!! haha, it's about time.
I made a tree yesterday :) and the day before that a butterfly. Out of paper of course, but 3-D. As I was sitting there I thought to myself; Couldn't you just imagine the joy that the gods have in creating real worlds? It was easy to pretend and magnify the joy and sense of wonderfulness in the accomplishment by 1,000 and perhaps maybe, only begin to understand, the incredibleness that they feel.
Last night I was walking home from school and thought about waving to people. I'd walked that particular path to school a few weeks before with a friend and he commented about waving to people. Some people you did, and others you just didn't. It was funny because it didn't really have anything to do with whether you knew them or not. Anyway, the memory just made me smile and miss him.
A year ago today, the people up here woke to six inches of snow. Could you imagine? That wouldn't have been ideal weather for our field trip. It attempted to snow yesterday though, I laughed :) But it's sunshiny, if not a little bit chilly, but we'll just wrap up warmly before heading off.
I'm incredibly happy.
Got a grand total of 50 cents in my savings account and had to borrow $5 just to make my car payment... but I'm rich in so many other ways and the monetary value can't be measured on those.
I have a few, wonderful, true friends, an incredible family, and amazing students. I know a God who blesses and loves his children, and me specifically. I'm not just a name to him. I'm not just a number. I'm me. All of me. And he loves me more than I can ever fully comprehend. He is my best friend and I hope to always keep that relationship flourishing.
I have clothes and food and a healthy body. I have been granted countless opportunities to become better and to just be able to LIVE.
I do not want for anything really.
School is coming along marvelously, today we have a field trip to a pond and a spelling bee. And bowling. FINALLY!!!!!! haha, it's about time.
I made a tree yesterday :) and the day before that a butterfly. Out of paper of course, but 3-D. As I was sitting there I thought to myself; Couldn't you just imagine the joy that the gods have in creating real worlds? It was easy to pretend and magnify the joy and sense of wonderfulness in the accomplishment by 1,000 and perhaps maybe, only begin to understand, the incredibleness that they feel.
Last night I was walking home from school and thought about waving to people. I'd walked that particular path to school a few weeks before with a friend and he commented about waving to people. Some people you did, and others you just didn't. It was funny because it didn't really have anything to do with whether you knew them or not. Anyway, the memory just made me smile and miss him.
A year ago today, the people up here woke to six inches of snow. Could you imagine? That wouldn't have been ideal weather for our field trip. It attempted to snow yesterday though, I laughed :) But it's sunshiny, if not a little bit chilly, but we'll just wrap up warmly before heading off.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Today in my life
Oh happiness! But first a confession. I'm pretty positive one of my students is going bald. Haha, now I know that sounds slightly odd, but his father is rather bald as well. I can't decide if it's just a bad hair cut or something but really, there is a suspicious thinning part of hair on the back of his head. Or maybe it's just the hair-do. Although it's been that way for about a week now, who knows. It just makes me laugh.
Of course, today, a lot of things are making me laugh and smile. It's a wonderful day. Yesterday was an odd one and the day before that even more so, but today for some reason I'm incredibly happy. Except I know that reason.
God is so good! It's amazing how close he wants to be and how reassuring he is if you give him your doubts and imperfections and really LISTEN to what he is saying. Without words.
We had a lesson in Girl's Class last night about the Holy Ghost and keeping it with you always, it's always funny to me how much God is sitting here, teaching me the things I need, right as I need them and sometimes even before. It just makes me laugh. At myself, and life.
Sure, things are no where near what some may call 'perfect' but I consider it to be, I'm incredibly blessed with more than I could possibly ever want, and I have an unfailing trust that God will always provide. It's amazing how he can work in your life, if you will allow him to.
So I guess that is what I'm going to ask each of you today. Let Him work miracles in your life. He will, I know he will.
All my love!
Of course, today, a lot of things are making me laugh and smile. It's a wonderful day. Yesterday was an odd one and the day before that even more so, but today for some reason I'm incredibly happy. Except I know that reason.
God is so good! It's amazing how close he wants to be and how reassuring he is if you give him your doubts and imperfections and really LISTEN to what he is saying. Without words.
We had a lesson in Girl's Class last night about the Holy Ghost and keeping it with you always, it's always funny to me how much God is sitting here, teaching me the things I need, right as I need them and sometimes even before. It just makes me laugh. At myself, and life.
Sure, things are no where near what some may call 'perfect' but I consider it to be, I'm incredibly blessed with more than I could possibly ever want, and I have an unfailing trust that God will always provide. It's amazing how he can work in your life, if you will allow him to.
So I guess that is what I'm going to ask each of you today. Let Him work miracles in your life. He will, I know he will.
All my love!
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Best Friend
And this is why I love Chelle.
She just texted me and asked "Do you think frogs have boogers?"
I said, probably not, no.
Her reply: "What about deer?"
My answer, Yep.
Totally random, but wonderful too.
Just like the time she texts me at work and says something to the effect of "You know what sounds like so much fun and that we need to do sometime? Go through the drive through at Dairy Queen in reverse"
I laughed, and agreed.
What would I do without her? I have no idea, but I'm so glad I don't have to find out.
She just texted me and asked "Do you think frogs have boogers?"
I said, probably not, no.
Her reply: "What about deer?"
My answer, Yep.
Totally random, but wonderful too.
Just like the time she texts me at work and says something to the effect of "You know what sounds like so much fun and that we need to do sometime? Go through the drive through at Dairy Queen in reverse"
I laughed, and agreed.
What would I do without her? I have no idea, but I'm so glad I don't have to find out.
Grandma Rhoda
Today is my grandma's birthday. She's a wonderful grandma. I used to think she was one of those people who was perpetually young, could never grow old, and was as close to an angel as you'd ever get. Life hasn't been easy, but she's borne every trial with a queen's grace and strength. Come to find out, after Parkinson's, divorce from her longtime spouse and love, the death of her youngest son, and various trials life has attempted to beat her down with, I was pretty much right on the mark when it came to who she is.
Sure, life has taken it's toll and she does have a hard time talking correctly sometimes- the affect of Parkinson's. But can I just say I will always and forever love being held by her. I'm her baby girl. She is the one person who can cuddle me just perfectly. Since Parkinson's has set in it is hard for her hands to stay still, but I love it, I love holding them. I love watching them, through the years, making bread, cookies, doing hair, folding laundry, canning, baking, sweeping, clapping. A perfect expression of her.
So many memories of this wonderful woman. She was the one who introduced me to the wonders of dryers. And dancing. And tree houses. And peaches, apricots, and sour pie cherries. "Snowball" bushes, lilacs, and wild roses. Bleeding hearts- the flower, although she has, though the years, been a refuge for many scraped up, bleeding, and broken hearts. Climbing ivy, and those little purple flowers that grow on some sort of ground cover. Her yard has always been a wonderful place. Swings, trampoline, basketball court, volleyball net, apple trees, croquet. Family get togethers, hot dog and marshmallow roasts. Yes. Those are the things that really matter. You see, here it was we learned what love is, what family means.
Somewhere between the piano lessons and cookie making lessons, decorating gingerbread houses, cleaning out the shed and vacuuming the front room floor, she was able to portray to us the value of simply taking the time to slow down and smell the flowers. Appreciate the simple, little things of life. For that's what really matters.
I hope she knows how much she affects all who know her for the better. Her life has been one of service to others, her family, children, grandchildren, friends, complete strangers that soon became friends, neighbors, and so many more.
I'm grateful to be able to claim her for my grandmother and wonderful friend and want to take this time to yet again, express my love and appreciation for her. I love you grandma :)
Sure, life has taken it's toll and she does have a hard time talking correctly sometimes- the affect of Parkinson's. But can I just say I will always and forever love being held by her. I'm her baby girl. She is the one person who can cuddle me just perfectly. Since Parkinson's has set in it is hard for her hands to stay still, but I love it, I love holding them. I love watching them, through the years, making bread, cookies, doing hair, folding laundry, canning, baking, sweeping, clapping. A perfect expression of her.
So many memories of this wonderful woman. She was the one who introduced me to the wonders of dryers. And dancing. And tree houses. And peaches, apricots, and sour pie cherries. "Snowball" bushes, lilacs, and wild roses. Bleeding hearts- the flower, although she has, though the years, been a refuge for many scraped up, bleeding, and broken hearts. Climbing ivy, and those little purple flowers that grow on some sort of ground cover. Her yard has always been a wonderful place. Swings, trampoline, basketball court, volleyball net, apple trees, croquet. Family get togethers, hot dog and marshmallow roasts. Yes. Those are the things that really matter. You see, here it was we learned what love is, what family means.
Somewhere between the piano lessons and cookie making lessons, decorating gingerbread houses, cleaning out the shed and vacuuming the front room floor, she was able to portray to us the value of simply taking the time to slow down and smell the flowers. Appreciate the simple, little things of life. For that's what really matters.
I hope she knows how much she affects all who know her for the better. Her life has been one of service to others, her family, children, grandchildren, friends, complete strangers that soon became friends, neighbors, and so many more.
I'm grateful to be able to claim her for my grandmother and wonderful friend and want to take this time to yet again, express my love and appreciation for her. I love you grandma :)
Friday, April 17, 2009
Craziness
I've been CRAVING chocolate lately. And a good talk with one of my best friends, we have a lot to catch up on. Last night I was able to satisfy both of those cravings at least a little bit. She had a performance and I went for moral support. Moral support means a lot sometimes. More than perhaps we'll ever know.
Can I just tell you how much I love her? She is a wonderful woman and I wonder how long I could have gone on in life without knowing her. We met, and became instant friends the first time we spent more than 5 minutes together. I don't know that I'd still be sane if it wasn't for her, she became my closest friend at a time when I didn't have close (at least in distance) friends. It's a little bit wacky. We are a little bit wacky. But that's just part of how wonderful life is.
I love my classroom when there are no children in it. Haha, that sounds almost horrible, but the silence is good. It's a companion to me too. I talk to my room. Leaving for Spring Break I had a friend with me and started saying goodbye to my room and he looked at me like "are you talking to me?", I laughed and said "I talk to my classroom." I also talk to my car, and my books, my printer, my hair. Some people might think I'm crazy and you know what? I am ;)
Can I just tell you how much I love her? She is a wonderful woman and I wonder how long I could have gone on in life without knowing her. We met, and became instant friends the first time we spent more than 5 minutes together. I don't know that I'd still be sane if it wasn't for her, she became my closest friend at a time when I didn't have close (at least in distance) friends. It's a little bit wacky. We are a little bit wacky. But that's just part of how wonderful life is.
I love my classroom when there are no children in it. Haha, that sounds almost horrible, but the silence is good. It's a companion to me too. I talk to my room. Leaving for Spring Break I had a friend with me and started saying goodbye to my room and he looked at me like "are you talking to me?", I laughed and said "I talk to my classroom." I also talk to my car, and my books, my printer, my hair. Some people might think I'm crazy and you know what? I am ;)
Monday, April 13, 2009
The *not so* Brief Update
So a lot has been happening. Especially in about the past week/week and a half. Spring break began on the 3rd with a half day. I walked out the door that morning and found someone I hadn't expected to see for a while leaned up against the side of my house watching the snow fall. I was too stressed to be pleasantly surprised like I was the last time he randomly showed up- sadly.
Anyway, I invited him in and left him in the kitchen talking to my grandmother, while I went to school. He talked to her the whole time I was gone. It made me laugh, there aren't many friends I have who can do that, but he is one of them.
After school we had a good time, got ice cream, went on a walk, all the usual stuff. Talked. It was good.
He'd come up for the youth retreat that Saturday and Sunday.
That is a whole 'nother story. Let's just say 36 hours and about 15 hours of sleep, don't sit too well with me. I was cranky. And all the stress that'd built up over these past few weeks was only beginning to come out.
Anyway, we got home Sunday afternoon, and stayed up until four that morning, talking again. Long story short, we knew we were going to be in major trouble but it had needed to happen :)
My parents found out the next day... when I walked in the door my uncle was wide awake. I was too tired to care though, I was going to tell them anyway, I just hadn't expected it to be like that. Oh well.
So Monday I travelled home, here to Utah, and that night he came over to my parents home and we straightened things out with them, telling them what we'd talked about and decided so late at night.
Bottom line is.... we're not talking for a month, absolute no contact, and then sometime in the future we're getting back together again. Super happy to finally be able to say that, and my parents are rather relieved we finally owned up to what was going on instead of insisting to 'just be friends'. Haha.
Tuesday I went to go see a friend from my old work and that night I left for my 'disappearing' with my girl friends. I was really really tired and actually we were supposed to have left that morning but I begged them to postpone it a little.
We went to Cedar City (for the first time I can ever remember going there, sad huh?) and stayed with one of the girl's aunts that first night. Then on to Saint George where we spent Wednesday and Thursday. I think we all learned a lot on that trip. Not that it actually came to outright fights or anything, but I realized how much I have changed, who I am. Seeing these girls that I've grown up with since before I can remember, and to see how we have changed, how we are different, and where we are the same, was really a needed experience. And we had fun too.
I found my wedding dress! Just kidding, actually, at the DI for $100, pretty much amazing. It was adorable and only needed a jacket for sleeves or something. It's a pity I didn't have $100 to spare. haha.
We took crazy pictures, fell asleep in the sun, played around in the pool, and did other sorts of insane things that only best friends can do and actually make look good.
Friday we came home, and I spent time with the family. Can I just say how much I'm looking forward to moving home with my family and the community we live in? It's wonderful.
Saturday morning I woke up with all the intentions of getting my car re-registered... and ended up crashing it into a cement barrier at the gas station, deploying the passenger side air bag and leaving even MORE repairs to be done. Seriously, it was really rather hard to see the bright spot in the whole mess. I still don't know how I'm going to be able to pay for it. But it's in God's hands and He'll provide. I do know that I'm grateful no one was hurt and that the damage was minimal.
At this point I was totally NOT in the mood to attend the dance that night and in desparate need of girl time so I called up my best friend Courtney and we arranged to meet up and hang out. But first there were other things to do. Like drive my sister to her friends house and meet up with a friend who'd been insisting we needed to talk face to face for a while. He was right. The conversation needed to take place, there were too many miscommunications that had to be cleared up. It happened, life goes on. What needed to be said was said. Granted it could have taken place better than it did. But the past is in the past.
After that I got to spend hours with Court, catching up on everything. Oh there was tons to cover. Then we drove up to Heber City to visit a friend I call Amazing Boy. He'd just gotten his wisdom teeth removed the day before and boy did I have sympathy for him!
The whole evening was wonderful and completely what I needed.
Sunday was a good day, Easter morning always seems to be beautiful, doesn't matter where you are. I was able to chat for a little bit with my engaged friend. He's marrying one of my best friends come this June, and has always been so encouraging and supportive of me and my dreams. Haha, unfortunately he seems to know that every girl in the world has at one point or another, had a crush on him. So he tends to think all girls love him. Which, he's right, about 90% of the time. It's just the other 10% he is oblivious to. And that makes me laugh.
Then we went over to my aunt's house and did an Easter Egg Hunt. Dad hid these Starburst jellybeans... I don't know if we ever did manage to find all of them. It was tons of fun.
Now I'm here, waiting for news on my car.... and hopefully I can get home in time to teach tomorrow morning. Life goes on!
Anyway, I invited him in and left him in the kitchen talking to my grandmother, while I went to school. He talked to her the whole time I was gone. It made me laugh, there aren't many friends I have who can do that, but he is one of them.
After school we had a good time, got ice cream, went on a walk, all the usual stuff. Talked. It was good.
He'd come up for the youth retreat that Saturday and Sunday.
That is a whole 'nother story. Let's just say 36 hours and about 15 hours of sleep, don't sit too well with me. I was cranky. And all the stress that'd built up over these past few weeks was only beginning to come out.
Anyway, we got home Sunday afternoon, and stayed up until four that morning, talking again. Long story short, we knew we were going to be in major trouble but it had needed to happen :)
My parents found out the next day... when I walked in the door my uncle was wide awake. I was too tired to care though, I was going to tell them anyway, I just hadn't expected it to be like that. Oh well.
So Monday I travelled home, here to Utah, and that night he came over to my parents home and we straightened things out with them, telling them what we'd talked about and decided so late at night.
Bottom line is.... we're not talking for a month, absolute no contact, and then sometime in the future we're getting back together again. Super happy to finally be able to say that, and my parents are rather relieved we finally owned up to what was going on instead of insisting to 'just be friends'. Haha.
Tuesday I went to go see a friend from my old work and that night I left for my 'disappearing' with my girl friends. I was really really tired and actually we were supposed to have left that morning but I begged them to postpone it a little.
We went to Cedar City (for the first time I can ever remember going there, sad huh?) and stayed with one of the girl's aunts that first night. Then on to Saint George where we spent Wednesday and Thursday. I think we all learned a lot on that trip. Not that it actually came to outright fights or anything, but I realized how much I have changed, who I am. Seeing these girls that I've grown up with since before I can remember, and to see how we have changed, how we are different, and where we are the same, was really a needed experience. And we had fun too.
I found my wedding dress! Just kidding, actually, at the DI for $100, pretty much amazing. It was adorable and only needed a jacket for sleeves or something. It's a pity I didn't have $100 to spare. haha.
We took crazy pictures, fell asleep in the sun, played around in the pool, and did other sorts of insane things that only best friends can do and actually make look good.
Friday we came home, and I spent time with the family. Can I just say how much I'm looking forward to moving home with my family and the community we live in? It's wonderful.
Saturday morning I woke up with all the intentions of getting my car re-registered... and ended up crashing it into a cement barrier at the gas station, deploying the passenger side air bag and leaving even MORE repairs to be done. Seriously, it was really rather hard to see the bright spot in the whole mess. I still don't know how I'm going to be able to pay for it. But it's in God's hands and He'll provide. I do know that I'm grateful no one was hurt and that the damage was minimal.
At this point I was totally NOT in the mood to attend the dance that night and in desparate need of girl time so I called up my best friend Courtney and we arranged to meet up and hang out. But first there were other things to do. Like drive my sister to her friends house and meet up with a friend who'd been insisting we needed to talk face to face for a while. He was right. The conversation needed to take place, there were too many miscommunications that had to be cleared up. It happened, life goes on. What needed to be said was said. Granted it could have taken place better than it did. But the past is in the past.
After that I got to spend hours with Court, catching up on everything. Oh there was tons to cover. Then we drove up to Heber City to visit a friend I call Amazing Boy. He'd just gotten his wisdom teeth removed the day before and boy did I have sympathy for him!
The whole evening was wonderful and completely what I needed.
Sunday was a good day, Easter morning always seems to be beautiful, doesn't matter where you are. I was able to chat for a little bit with my engaged friend. He's marrying one of my best friends come this June, and has always been so encouraging and supportive of me and my dreams. Haha, unfortunately he seems to know that every girl in the world has at one point or another, had a crush on him. So he tends to think all girls love him. Which, he's right, about 90% of the time. It's just the other 10% he is oblivious to. And that makes me laugh.
Then we went over to my aunt's house and did an Easter Egg Hunt. Dad hid these Starburst jellybeans... I don't know if we ever did manage to find all of them. It was tons of fun.
Now I'm here, waiting for news on my car.... and hopefully I can get home in time to teach tomorrow morning. Life goes on!
Monday, March 2, 2009
Wordless Conversations
So really, human moments are not my favorite. I love getting over them, and learning what it is they have to teach, but I don't particularly care for the way they kind of kick you where it hurts. Going through a lot of those.... I didn't used to. I used to have life down, and it was perfect, I was perfect. Ok, not really, but the illusion was easier to keep up. Now, not so much. Now I struggle with emotions and feelings that shouldn't be there. Stupid actions resulting from lack of self-control and ill-judged situations. And I can't exactly just pretend it all away again. Which is good. It's a good thing really.
I learn a lot more this way, it just also hurts a lot more this way too. Pride is something we all have, and I have an ample amount. Temper at someone who is doing things 'wrong' or criticizing a weakness I have. That is a huge one. Learning to accept feedback, whether helpfully, or destructively meant. I tend to ramble on and finish other people's sentences for them because I think I know what they are going to say and they are just taking too long to say it. Haha. Bad tendency. One that I need to fix. I am slowly relearning the blessing and need there is to just not say anything at all sometimes.
You can learn a lot from just shutting your mouth. One, how much idle chatter really is most of all we say throughout the day. Two, who you really are. Processing the thoughts before they just Come out of your mouth, is not exactly something for the weak.
I will tell you one thing I miss a lot, that sucks so bad about missing my best friends. The way we can just sit there, not saying anything, and completely not need to. We read each other's thoughts enough to not need to. But it's more than that. We just have enough, to just be there, that is enough. To know that they are there, is all we have needed. Sometimes conversation just isn't needed. Silence is though.
Reminds me of another funny quirk about being a girl with a best friend on a double date. Courtney and I would often have completely separate conversations with only about three spoken words, the poor guys were so clueless. It was awesome.
I learn a lot more this way, it just also hurts a lot more this way too. Pride is something we all have, and I have an ample amount. Temper at someone who is doing things 'wrong' or criticizing a weakness I have. That is a huge one. Learning to accept feedback, whether helpfully, or destructively meant. I tend to ramble on and finish other people's sentences for them because I think I know what they are going to say and they are just taking too long to say it. Haha. Bad tendency. One that I need to fix. I am slowly relearning the blessing and need there is to just not say anything at all sometimes.
You can learn a lot from just shutting your mouth. One, how much idle chatter really is most of all we say throughout the day. Two, who you really are. Processing the thoughts before they just Come out of your mouth, is not exactly something for the weak.
I will tell you one thing I miss a lot, that sucks so bad about missing my best friends. The way we can just sit there, not saying anything, and completely not need to. We read each other's thoughts enough to not need to. But it's more than that. We just have enough, to just be there, that is enough. To know that they are there, is all we have needed. Sometimes conversation just isn't needed. Silence is though.
Reminds me of another funny quirk about being a girl with a best friend on a double date. Courtney and I would often have completely separate conversations with only about three spoken words, the poor guys were so clueless. It was awesome.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
So I've been thinking again. About a lot of things. But mostly the hurt we inflict upon others, the pain of missing loved ones, and communication.
I miss my family, terribly so again. I miss being able to hold my babies and snuggle and kneel for prayer each night and give hugs and kisses to those who mean the most to me. I miss laughing and playing and quarrelling and teasing with kids that have known me for me for such a long time.
I miss my parents and grandparents and extended family. I miss the closeness that we once shared that now, seems to have slipped away...
I miss my friends. I miss my wonderful girl friends and the absolutely marvelous times we have together. I miss being able to just goof off, look like an idiot, and having three other people along who just join in or initiate the fun. I miss my guy friends, both the ones I talked to almost constantly for the past while, and those I haven't had a good conversation with in ages. I miss just having a good companion to hear stories, with no strings attached. They don't expect me to fix all their problems (or even help them with their troubles) and be there for them 100% of the time, nor do I them. And in that we were strong, yet flexible.
Hurt, the hurt we bring to others by not listening to them, and by not talking to them. I guess I'm feeling the former and inflicting the latter? Somewhere along the line, we not only stopped talking, we stopped communicating. And that hurts me, even more than the not talking.
Communication. This morning I woke up, talked with my aunt for a while, and just reveled in the feeling. I love that woman so much and often do not do the best job of showing her so.
...And that seems to be a tendancy I have for those who are dearest to me.
I've been reading more and more, there's not much other to do when you're up at midnight and the whole rest of the house is asleep. I have about six different places marked in my scriptures and will just pick them up, open to one, and start reading. Ether is really good as is Alma. Although in Ether they have a land of Moron, which I laughed about upon reading.
Thinking about dreams and ideals. Imaginings I had as a child that now, seem to either be becoming increasingly true, or terribly not. I guess that's where things land though. One way or the other. But are dreams really worth it then? What is the point of having something that doesn't happen, imagining things better than they turn out to be.
Then I think of the phrase, Stand for something or you'll fall for anything. And wonder where the optimist in me is hiding. I know she's in there somewhere and that she's still with me part of the way everyday. But the active optimist, where did she run away to?
I guess this is what I'm here for, to find her again.
I miss my family, terribly so again. I miss being able to hold my babies and snuggle and kneel for prayer each night and give hugs and kisses to those who mean the most to me. I miss laughing and playing and quarrelling and teasing with kids that have known me for me for such a long time.
I miss my parents and grandparents and extended family. I miss the closeness that we once shared that now, seems to have slipped away...
I miss my friends. I miss my wonderful girl friends and the absolutely marvelous times we have together. I miss being able to just goof off, look like an idiot, and having three other people along who just join in or initiate the fun. I miss my guy friends, both the ones I talked to almost constantly for the past while, and those I haven't had a good conversation with in ages. I miss just having a good companion to hear stories, with no strings attached. They don't expect me to fix all their problems (or even help them with their troubles) and be there for them 100% of the time, nor do I them. And in that we were strong, yet flexible.
Hurt, the hurt we bring to others by not listening to them, and by not talking to them. I guess I'm feeling the former and inflicting the latter? Somewhere along the line, we not only stopped talking, we stopped communicating. And that hurts me, even more than the not talking.
Communication. This morning I woke up, talked with my aunt for a while, and just reveled in the feeling. I love that woman so much and often do not do the best job of showing her so.
...And that seems to be a tendancy I have for those who are dearest to me.
I've been reading more and more, there's not much other to do when you're up at midnight and the whole rest of the house is asleep. I have about six different places marked in my scriptures and will just pick them up, open to one, and start reading. Ether is really good as is Alma. Although in Ether they have a land of Moron, which I laughed about upon reading.
Thinking about dreams and ideals. Imaginings I had as a child that now, seem to either be becoming increasingly true, or terribly not. I guess that's where things land though. One way or the other. But are dreams really worth it then? What is the point of having something that doesn't happen, imagining things better than they turn out to be.
Then I think of the phrase, Stand for something or you'll fall for anything. And wonder where the optimist in me is hiding. I know she's in there somewhere and that she's still with me part of the way everyday. But the active optimist, where did she run away to?
I guess this is what I'm here for, to find her again.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Strange Me
So it's just decided. I have the strangest conversations ever. haha. I don't know if it's that I initiate them, attract them, or participate in them so often, probably all three? But I often do have in depth conversations with almost complete strangers. And talk about things that most people don't usually bring up. Which makes people laugh and smile, something I love seeing.
I love my life and the fun I have in living. Even when I'm being totally and completely random and weird and messy- and I know that I'm just ridiculous, even in those times, I still laugh. Mostly at myself, but hey, it's good laughter, and medicine for my soul.
I love my life and the fun I have in living. Even when I'm being totally and completely random and weird and messy- and I know that I'm just ridiculous, even in those times, I still laugh. Mostly at myself, but hey, it's good laughter, and medicine for my soul.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Ice Fishing
So today I went ice fishing with Sam, his brother Glenn, his Uncle Charlie (who happens to be my mom's cousin) and two of Sam's cousins (who happen to be one of my students older siblings) haha. Got to love the family connections :D
Anyway, we were over at Charlie's house last night until about 11:30- he has two absolutely adorable little girls and the older one has adopted me and the younger one prefers Sam but I can get her to play with me too. It's just been good, I'm not used to snuggling with little ones... Isaac doesn't particularly like to and Izzy and Riley are to the point where they are more angles and bones than fluffiness.
This morning at 4:30 is when we took off. It's just been a lot of fun, it was a lot of fun and really enjoyable, to hang out with the guys. It was me and five guys- I thought other girls were going to come, Charlie's wife and his sister, but no. I'm the oldest child and so I don't know what it feels like really to have older brothers. That's what this was, just good, time with brothers. They were goofy and gave each other crap like no other and I was included in it, not just a bystander that was left on the outside, but a sister, someone they teased and though it wasn't often, I was able to get some really good ones back at them.
Haha! So story, yesterday Sam and I went over to his grandma's house to eat ice cream and visit with her, because, while I live maybe ten minutes away from her, I never talk to her and she's a wonderful lady. We'd finished eating the ice cream and she asked if he wanted anything else. He said "Well I'd also like some singing monkeys if you've got any of those" teasing-like. To our utter surprise she said yes actually I do have some of those if you really want them. We just laughed and thought oh grand joke! But then she went into her back room and came out with these two monkeys who sang a song. She really did have singing monkeys. I don't think I've laughed so hard in a long time. To see the utter trickster and jokester get a whopping like that. It's healthy for him you know, to be around others who can cut him down to size. And I just smile and love it, because I hardly ever can even though sometimes I really wish to. I think I've laughed and smiled more these past few days.... than anytime I can remember for an awfully long time. It's been good. When we broke up, Sam said he missed making memories with me. Now that we are just friends, those old memories are replaced and added to by something even better- a deep, lasting close friendship bond.
So here's to friends!
Anyway, we were over at Charlie's house last night until about 11:30- he has two absolutely adorable little girls and the older one has adopted me and the younger one prefers Sam but I can get her to play with me too. It's just been good, I'm not used to snuggling with little ones... Isaac doesn't particularly like to and Izzy and Riley are to the point where they are more angles and bones than fluffiness.
This morning at 4:30 is when we took off. It's just been a lot of fun, it was a lot of fun and really enjoyable, to hang out with the guys. It was me and five guys- I thought other girls were going to come, Charlie's wife and his sister, but no. I'm the oldest child and so I don't know what it feels like really to have older brothers. That's what this was, just good, time with brothers. They were goofy and gave each other crap like no other and I was included in it, not just a bystander that was left on the outside, but a sister, someone they teased and though it wasn't often, I was able to get some really good ones back at them.
Haha! So story, yesterday Sam and I went over to his grandma's house to eat ice cream and visit with her, because, while I live maybe ten minutes away from her, I never talk to her and she's a wonderful lady. We'd finished eating the ice cream and she asked if he wanted anything else. He said "Well I'd also like some singing monkeys if you've got any of those" teasing-like. To our utter surprise she said yes actually I do have some of those if you really want them. We just laughed and thought oh grand joke! But then she went into her back room and came out with these two monkeys who sang a song. She really did have singing monkeys. I don't think I've laughed so hard in a long time. To see the utter trickster and jokester get a whopping like that. It's healthy for him you know, to be around others who can cut him down to size. And I just smile and love it, because I hardly ever can even though sometimes I really wish to. I think I've laughed and smiled more these past few days.... than anytime I can remember for an awfully long time. It's been good. When we broke up, Sam said he missed making memories with me. Now that we are just friends, those old memories are replaced and added to by something even better- a deep, lasting close friendship bond.
So here's to friends!
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