Home Alone

And loving it!
Can't tell you how rare an occasion this is. To have EVERYONE out of the house? It's very odd. But I'm too happy about it to care about the weirdness of it :)
I've been thinking lately, about how once you're married, there is a very fine balance between joining with this person you absolutely adore & creating a life together, becoming as one, and retaining your sense of self. You need both, very much so. I just find as time goes on, I'll be sitting there & realize that my handsome & loving husband does so much talking, sometimes it's hard for me to get a word in edge-wise. Ironic no?
Isn't the girl supposed to be the noisy one?
Well I'm not nearly as talkative as I listen. Why? Because I know the value in having someone listen to you. I understand that, so I do my best to be that person for people. Not that I don't like to gab people's ears off, because I can & will do from time to time- I just realize it's not always about Me, and for the most part, other people don't feel listened to enough. Which, I have discovered by reading The Female Brain by Louann Brizendine, (interesting book, it sheds a lot of light on how hormones majorly affect women,) that women need to feel included & connected to. (Duh, I could have told you that) But how do they express it? I'd definitely recommend the book, just know to take it with a grain of salt or two.
Back to what I was originally getting at. Sometimes- not very often, but it does happen- I feel swallowed up, shut up, or muted. Not that said husband is actively doing anything to 'make me feel that way' I say that because honestly he's not, he's being himself, his loving, caring, normal, human, self.
And also no one can 'make me feel' any way I don't allow them to.
Sometimes I let myself start to get lost. Now, I suppose I could use the quote "Lose yourself in Christ & you will find yourself" but I don't think God ever meant we were supposed to lose our opinions, loves, thoughts & feelings. That would be called dead. We were sent to this earth to LIVE.
This is my life, my person, and my choices. I choose to live. I chose & am choosing to live a life of love, gratitude, & service, even if it is only in small ways.
'Life' has a way of getting in the way & helping us forget what we really know & choose. Getting us to think we need to be busier than is healthy, do more than is physically possible, and stretch until we are emotionally exhausted. That is not me though.
So, it's at moments like these, when the house is quiet but for the noises I choose to allow into my life, that I rejoice in the chance I have to remind myself, who I am.